


You are the knife I twist within myself

by Lizicia



Series: i didn't know that we could break a silver lining [3]
Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
Genre: AU, Angst, But mostly feelings, F/M, Romance, fairytale retelling, kind of, little red riding hood sort of not quite inspired
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-26
Updated: 2015-01-26
Packaged: 2018-03-09 04:24:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,622
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3236132
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lizicia/pseuds/Lizicia
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>'Their story is probably not quite normal.<br/>Skye meets Grant Ward when he wrenches open the door to the van she has thought was hidden from the prying eyes of the government and pulls a bag over her head.<br/>Skye doesn't know it yet but she's begun something which cannot end.'</p><p>Or, a whisper of the re-telling of 'Little Red Riding Hood'</p>
            </blockquote>





	You are the knife I twist within myself

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! It is my turn to skyeward a fairytale and I played a bit fast and loose with it, so this is only slightly 'Little Red Riding Hood'.  
> This will be sad.  
> Also, there is no Hydra in this story but it kind of follows the events of season 1.

Their story is probably not quite normal.

Skye meets Grant Ward when he wrenches open the door to the van she has thought was hidden from the prying eyes of the government and pulls a bag over her head.

And then he proceeds to interrogate her, that government lackey with no thoughts of his own, just slaving away in the name of a monstrous organization which makes its sole aim to quench the truth, to lie to the people who have a right to know.

She is furious but that lasts only about three seconds until, under the influence of the truth serum, he confesses that he finds her attractive and spills the secrets she's been looking for. It is _fun_ .

He becomes her S.O. – like she  _needs_ one – and they clash and fight and bicker and it shouldn't be as rewarding as it is when she disarms Ian Quinn or as terrifying when his men chase her through his house and she runs, runs, runs until she runs straight into Ward and only her hands curling into the front of his vest calm her racing heart.

So really, is it any wonder that when they get back on the Bus and her hands are still shaking slightly and she can feel the imprint of his solidness on them, she seeks him out? And fists her fingers in his black shirt and pulls him close until she can feel his heart beating a tad fast too and his breath is on her lips and there is nothing that calms her down like his assent to her forcefulness.

It is meant to be just this once, just for fun.

Skye doesn't know it yet but she's begun something which cannot end.

* * *

 

Post-mission debriefs become wandering hands and secret kisses and quiet moans they steal for themselves and it's not only her demanding, it's also him, caressing and holding and whispering sweet nothings into her ear when he thinks she's too far gone to properly listen.

She never is.

They pretend like it's only physical, like it doesn't matter and that holds for about five seconds or until Skye sees the Berserker staff almost break him and holds him close in the aftermath, lying on the cold floor of a church and wondering how they became this.

He's quiet in her arms later in the night, just breathing the same air, sharing the same space and not trying to conceal the weight of whatever he saw still hanging over him. When he tells her, finally, that he saw his brothers and talks about the horrors of his childhood, about the older brother who forced him to do unthinkable things, she only presses closer to him and doesn't let the monsters get to him, and she knows.

There is no way to go back from this. Fortunately for both of them, neither wants to.

So they cheat themselves into thinking that they can be okay if they only try hard enough. That for all the weird and magical elements they have to combat, there will always be the two of them to make things normal again.

* * *

 

When Ian Quinn shoots Skye, Ward almost doesn't know what to do with himself. This is why it is a bad idea to get involved with anyone, let alone with a team member, with someone who is already his responsibility in so many ways. He looks at her, completely still in the hyperbaric chamber and knows that he would do anything to get her back and knows that they are so far gone that there is no way to go back from this.

John comes on board, takes one look at him and waves him over. “Come on, son, let's have a drink.”

He doesn't want to leave her but lingers for a second and that second is all that his former S.O. needs to realize that what is going on is even more than he already suspected.

“We might need more than one drink, huh?”

He pours them a slosh of something and Ward drinks automatically, not thinking about the motion, not even tasting the alcohol, just relishing in the burn it leaves in its wake. It is infinitely better than the burn in his heart from watching Skye barely breathing.

“So, that girl, Skye. She is not just a hacker, is she?”

“She's a former member of the Rising Tide and a very valuable member of the team.”

John gives him one of his best  _don't screw with me_ looks and he caves a little bit. “She is...important to me.”

“I'll say.”

They drink in silence for a bit and Ward knows that John is just giving him time to formulate his thoughts because he won't let this go as easily as it seems and his favorite method of interrogation has always involved prolonged silences. They stopped making Ward nervous a long time ago. But he finds himself wanting to talk.

“She is so...I didn't even like her in the beginning. She is impulsive and reckless and flighty and just so different from everyone else.”

“Well, I'll be damned. I figured you were sleeping with her but this. This sounds a hell of a lot like a relationship.”

Ward laughs nervously; he's never let himself think that way because he can't afford do, because he is not like her, because she is so much.

“Do you love her?”

He takes a moment to think about it. Does he? Could he? He hasn't considered he even could because there is too much guarded about him, too much darkness and danger in his past, too much incompatible with who she is.

And yet, he cannot hide the undeniable truth that she might be exactly who he needs. So he nods slowly but doesn't let the words leave his mouth; they are reserved for her and her only and he can only hope he will ever be brave enough to tell her.

John smiles in a way Ward's never seen him smile and claps him on the shoulder once. “Good for you, son. Now let's go and save your girl, huh?”

And so they do, even if they have to storm a S.H.I.E.L.D. facility and possibly injure their co-workers; if they have to go through hell to exhaust all their possibilities of getting her back because he knows that he needs to hold on to her.

When she finally wakes up, he exhales shakily and gently tangles his fingers with hers; she doesn't fight it but smiles at him sleepily and contentedly.

“Hey. I just had the best dream about you.”

Ward laughs but it sounds more like a choking sob and looks at anywhere but her because she is alive, alive, alive, and he doesn't know if he can ever let her go.

He's not sure if she understands his inner turmoil in some inexplicable way of hers but she squeezes his fingers once.

“Grant.”

His first name coming out of her mouth has never sounded better and he feels like if she says it enough, he might forget that he's always hated his name because it's also his father's name but she can breathe new life into it.

“I'm okay. I'm here.”

And she soothes his pain with just six words and everything will be fine.

Later, when Skye heals and walks around and the wounds on her stomach have healed and Jemma has cleared her, he shows her everything he cannot yet say.

He maps out her body with his eyes and his hands and his mouth and whispers all his secrets into her skin, not daring to voice them out loud yet.

She accepts it, takes his promises without asking for them and this is it, this the beginning of his salvation.

When she holds him, as she always does, gently caressing his hair and he can hear her heart beating and her chest rising and falling with her breath, his own hands slightly touching her scars, he tries to tell her what he is and who she is and what that means.

“I have been trained to keep my emotions in check, Skye. I get the job done and I don't get involved, I can't let anything get to me.”

“You are black Kevlar.” She teases him, he can tell but her words cut right to where he wants to go and he should've known she would see through all of it.

“And you are not. You are different. And I thought that was bad for me but I'm not a good enough man to tell you to leave, especially after I saw you, after you were shot, fighting to stay alive.”

“Maybe I am as much Kevlar as you, huh? Haven't you considered that? That you don't have to pretend like we are different, that you don't have to shut me out.” Her voice is quiet and contemplative and he sighs because he wants that to be true.

“I wish I could do that. There are things about me that you don't know, that you wouldn't like. Things I've done. You're... _good_. And I'm not.”

Skye uses the hand in his hair to tug at it and force him to look at her; her eyes are big and filled with emotions he can't begin to comprehend before she presses closer to kiss him, slowly and delicately.

When she lets go, she doesn't let him look away but maintains the connection and the words that come out of her mouth are forceful, like she's not saying them only for his benefit but also her own. “Yes, you are. You think I'm too good for you? I have skeletons in my closet, I have secrets I've kept but don't put me on a pedestal. You are a good man, Grant.”

And she kisses him again and again and pushes at him until he lets her be on top. Skye finds his eyes in the dim light of the room, finds all the emotions he is concealing but wants to reveal and smiles.

“You are good. We are good.”

There is nothing he wants to believe in as much as this.

* * *

 

As much as things stay the same between them, they also become completely different. Skye tells Coulson and receives a stern look in response and Fitzsimmons are completely baffled like they haven't all been living on the Bus for months now and May smirks a little but she can tell that to her, it was no surprise at all.

For a while, they smile at each other a little more than they did before and he makes it a habit to touch her whenever they meet, not inappropriately but gently slide over her shoulder or let their palms meet in the middle of walking somewhere. And is it really her fault that these casual touches drive her a bit crazy and drive them to sneak off into their rooms in the middle of the day?

It feels like they are just beginning, even if this has been going on for months, and she is almost giddy with the realization that this might be the real thing, the best thing she has ever allowed into her life.

But the life around them goes on and monsters don't cease to exist and when Skye stares at Lady Sif – of  _Asgard_ – and her impressive form and the sword in her hand, she can almost believe that there are such things as gods.

She tells them of Lorelei, a mythical creature from her own realm who has come down on Earth and probably intends to wreak havoc because she can.

“What kind of powers are we talking about? Strength? Speed?”

“Sorcery.”

The words coming out of Lady Sif's mouth might have made Skye laugh before but now that she has seen more weird stuff than she could've imagined, she doesn't take that any less seriously than if she had said  _nuclear weapons_ .

“She bends and shapes the will of men to her own purpose.”

“Only men? Her powers don't work on women?”

“No. Men have an inherent weakness that we do not share. The mere sound of her voice can ensnare most. For the rare man that can resist, it is her voice shared with her touch. She will overpower his will by whatever means necessary.”

Skye thinks of the sorceress, this Lorelei, and Lady Sif's words and something churns uncomfortably in her stomach, something dark and warning.

When the team leaves to capture her, she catches up with Ward and just holds him close to her, not saying a word.

If he is surprised, he doesn't say but hugs her back and presses a kiss to her forehead.

“It will be fine, Skye.”

She doesn't know what she wants to tell him as there are so many possibilities and variations, and she doesn't want the most important of them to happen here, under the pressure of circumstances and her own fear, so she finally settles on one. “Come back safe, okay?”

He cups her cheek with one hand and smiles softly, the way he shows only her that he can. “I will.”

* * *

 

When he comes face to face with Lorelei in the back of a biker's bar, he can feel the magnetism exuding from her, the lilt of her voice floating around him and trying to bewitch him.

“You are a fine warrior.”

But he only has to think of Skye and the pull lessens and he focuses on the gun in his hand.

“I am. Now put your hands behind your back and get on your knees.”

She cocks an eyebrow at him and smirks. “Oh, men kneel before me. I am the big bad wolf.”

The power of her voice is strong but he thinks of brown eyes and a sassy smile and doesn't fall for her tricks.

Lorelei is not pleased. “You have heart. Interesting. And your heart has a name.”

She comes closer slowly, talking endlessly but her voice changes and suddenly, it is Skye's voice and Skye's eyes and Skye's steps and Ward can hear her and see her right in front of him, though as if through a haze.

“My fine warrior, let down your weapon for you are mine and I am yours.”

“Skye.” He doesn't know how she can be there but the gun in his hand wavers and he doesn't understand how he can be pointing it at her in the first place.

Skye chuckles and for a moment, he sees red hair and green eyes and the gun remains as he tries to clear the illusion from his eyes. “You are not Skye.”

“Oh, don't be silly.”

And just like that, she is really there, smiling and breathing and he has missed her so much already. “Skye, why are you here?”

“To be with you.”

“Why are your eyes not like I remember?”

“Because you are confused.”

“Why do you smell differently?”

“Because it is the battlefield and I've traveled a long way.”

She caresses his cheek with her hand and it feels right and wrong, like the impression of what he remembers.

“Why are your hands so soft?”

“Because I want to touch you so gently.”

He sees her mouth come closer and closer and it is too red, the grin on it too malicious and he knows it is not right. “Why is your mouth so red?”

“Because I want to kiss you right now.”

And she does and the warring emotions in his head go into a full-blown rage, simultaneously convincing him that this is Skye and this isn't Skye until he feels something leave his heart and be replaced.

Suddenly, she is yanked back and Lady Sif collars Lorelei's neck but not before she whispers “I am yours, now and forever” and in horror, Ward sees the collar around Skye's neck, sees her pleading at him and spurs into action.

“Let her go!”

Lady Sif knocks him back but it takes three men to contain him until he can't break loose but he keeps screaming at them to let Skye go, to just give her back, that he will do anything.

He doesn't see Coulson's wide eyes or May's disbelief; he doesn't notice anything beside the fact that for some reason, Skye has been captured and he howls out his pain before Sif knocks him out.

* * *

 

When the team returns to the Bus, Skye rushes out to greet them but comes to a halting step when she sees Ward in handcuffs.

“What happened?”

Everyone looks at each other but none of them seem to find the words; she sees the contemplation in Sif's eyes and Lorelei's gaze seems to taunt her but no one says anything.

She steps close to Ward and caresses his face, making him look at her. The eyes that stare back at her are not his own and she lets go of his face, startled.

“Who are you? Where is Skye?”

He asks this from her, looking straight at her and she didn't think anything could hurt more than Quinn's bullets but oh, how wrong she was.

“What the hell happened!” She yells at the team and finally, Lady Sif steps forward and Skye knows to brace herself for the worst.

“Lorelei tricked him with her sorcery, made him think that she was you, lured him into her spell.”

She whips her head to stare at the sorceress and sure enough, the taunting in her eyes remains and is even more pronounced.

“But she is collared. You said that if she can't speak, her magic spell will break.”

If Sif wasn't Asgardian but human, Skye would almost describe her slight movement as fidgeting but she stops as soon as she's noticed it and looks straight at her.

“This has only happened once before and I didn't think it was possible for her to do it again.”

“Well, why the hell not?”

Skye doesn't understand how Lady Sif could know and not tell them and she feels the anger rise within her.

“Because I didn't know anyone here was capable of such love. I am sorry.”

“So you have seen this before? What happened to that man?” Coulson asks the question she hasn't even considered yet and she turns pleading eyes towards Sif, hopeful that whatever comes out of her mouth will be good.

“I killed him. This trickery will never pass.”

The anguish that fills her veins is almost too much to handle, Sif's words ringing in hear eyes.  _I killed him, I killed him, I killed him._

“There has to be another way. You can't just go about killing people because they are under a spell. He will come back!” Skye whispers the words but Sif only shakes her head.

“I believed like you did but I want to spare you the pain of believing. There is nothing to be done. He will never see you again.”

And Skye's heart feels like breaking but she won't let it, not yet. She has to hope.

* * *

 

They keep Ward in a cell in Providence; she tries to fight the decision but after he almost kills two of the guards in his quest to get back to Lorelei, she thinks  _For his own protection_ and doesn't protest.

Skye stays behind with him, telling the team that she will bring him back, that one day they return and Ward is back (and loves her again but she doesn't say that). She ignores the looks of the team until Coulson nods and allows for it.

She stands in front of the darkened cell before taking a deep breath and forcing herself to be calm and collected and presses the button to make the glass transparent again.

He sits on the bed and when he turns to look at her, Skye can almost imagine that it is him and the tiny flicker of hope in her chest blossoms until his face falls and she can feel that expression crack her own heart open.

“Where is Skye? What have you done to her? I want to see her!”

His voice becomes increasingly louder and he steps closer to the divide between them and she is almost scared of his intensity and astonished that the idea of losing her would make him react in this way. But she remembers right on the heels of that discovery that he hasn't really lost  _her_ and there is an uncomfortable feeling in the pit of her stomach.

“Grant, please. I'm right here, right in front of you. Just look at me.”

He regards her suspiciously and scoffs. “I don't know who you are but you are not Skye. Don't try to trick me.”

A sob escapes her, unable to keep it down because he looks at her like she's a stranger and worse; even when they had just met, he would still regard her with a softer look than he is bestowing upon her now.

“Listen, I don't know who you are and I don't care. Just tell me that Skye is alright.” He pleads now and the infliction of his voice pierces her heart but she decides to give him this one thing, to pretend and maybe it will make something a bit better.

“She is, she is fine.”

And then, because she is apparently a masochist and can't stop there, asks “But why do you care so much about her?”

The look that fills his eyes when he thinks of her is so familiar and he smiles that small, private smile that only she has seen.

“Because I love her.”

She was wrong; there are worse things than killing him.

 


End file.
